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Love, Santa
Dear Friends, I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for me to leave under your tree
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Poor Turkey!
When I was a young turkey, new to the coop, my big brother Tom took me out on the stoop, then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow, and he told me there was something that I had to know.
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Homemade Bargain Gift
Here's a money saving tip for Christmas: Glue Ju Ju Bee on a Brick and mail it out as a fruitcake!-Julie Brown
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Believing in Santa
Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Clause. Unfortunately, so did my parents, so I never got anything!-Charlie Viracola
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The Miracle of Christmas
I think the real miracle of Christmasis how I get through it each year without killing my relatives!-Reno Goodale
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Jews & Christmas
December 25 is National Jews Go to the Movies Day!-Jon Stewart
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Bad Santa
A little girl asked santa to send her a sister. Santa said on one condition, send me your mother.
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Christmas Jokes - Question and Answer
Q: What do elves learn in school?A: The Elf-abet!Q: What's the most popular wine at Christmas?A: "I don't like sprouts" !Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
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A Microsoft Christmas
NORTH POLE (API) - MICROSOFT announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's summer estate somewhere in the
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Politically Correct Santa
'Twas the night before Christmas and Santa's a wreck...How to live in a world that's politically correct?His workers no longer would answer to "Elves","Vertically
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A Martha Stewart Christmas
Dear Santa:I rarely ask for much. This year is no exception. I don't need diamond earrings, handy slicer-dicers or comfy slippers. I only want one little thing, and I want it deeply.I want
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Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
A Russian couple was walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife."No, that
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Signs You've Had Too Much Holiday Cheer
1. You strike a match and light your nose. 2. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad. 3. You hear a duck quacking and it's you. 4. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant.
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Did Santa Give You That Present?
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike.The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring
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Enter the Pearly Gates
Three men die in a car accident Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven. On entering they must present something relating or associated with
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Lost X Files Christmas episode
Mulder: We're too late. It's already been here.Scully: Mulder, I hope you know what you are doing.Mulder: Look, Scully, just like the other homes: Douglas fir, truncated, mounted,
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Twenty ways to confuse Santa Claus
1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.2. While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a
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