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Dihydrogen Monoxide: The Invisible Killer
Dihydrogen Monoxide: The Invisible Killer Ban Dihydrogen Monoxide!Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncountedthousands of people every year. Most of
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Safest Way to Drive
Safest Way to Drive Peter Ludwig, a caver from Austria who is appalled by American drivinghabits, offers the following advice:The probability of being involved in a traffic accident
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Bell Labs Proves Existence of Dark Suckers
Bell Labs Proves Existence of Dark Suckers For years it has been believed that electric bulbs emitted light.However, recent information from Bell Labs has proven otherwise.
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English is a Crazy Language
English is a Crazy Language From: Charlie IndelicatoLet's face it -- English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplantnor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in
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Night Before Christmas
Night Before Christmas For Readers in their 23rd Year of Schooling 'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the annual yuletide
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Is There a Santa Claus?
Is There a Santa Claus?As a result of an overwhelming lack of requests, and with research help fromthat renown scientific journal SPY magazine (January, 1990) - I am pleased topresent the
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If Scientists Wrote Nursery Rhymes
If Scientists Wrote Nursery Rhymes How many can you solve? (Answers below)1. A research team proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologicprotuberance, the
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Save the Yeasts
Save the Yeasts EVERY TIME A LOAF OF BREAD IS BAKED, APPROXIMATELY 150,000,000 YEASTS ARE
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Technical Night Before Christmas
Technical Night Before Christmas 'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the annual Yuletide celebration, and throughout our place of residence, kinetic activity
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New scientific theories I
New scientific theories4th RunnerUp-- The earth may spin faster on its axis due todeforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increaseswhen the arms are brought in close to the
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New scientific theories II
New scientific theories3rd RunnerUp- Communist China is technologically underdevelopedbecause they have no alphabet. The lack of an alphabet meansthe Chinese cannot use
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New scientific theories III
New scientific theories2nd RunnerUp- The 'Why Yawning Is Contagious' Theory: You yawnto equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure changeoutside your eardrums unbalances other
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New scientific thoeries IV
New scientific thoeries1st RunnerUp- If an infinite number of rednecks riding in aninfinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number ofshotgun rounds at an infinite number of
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New scientific theories V
New scientific theoriesHONORABLE MENTION: The quantity of consonants in the Englishlanguage is absolutely constant. If consonants are omitted in onegeographic area, they turn up in
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New scientific theories VI
New scientific theoriesGRAND PRIZE WINNER: When a cat is dropped, it ALWAYS lands on itsfeet; and when toast is dropped, it ALWAYS lands with the butteredside facing down. Therefore, I
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